So, Del Taco recently rolled out its Crunchtada, and sent SN&R an invitation to try it.

So we did. And we (surprise!) weren’t too impressed.

First off, the Crunchtada is basically just a tostada—and we’re talking about the flavorless fast-food kind of tostada. What you get is a pile of beans globbed onto a fried flat tortilla shell, then topped with rubbery yellow cheese and bland lettuce. I felt a bit duped. 

Side note: It looks like Del Taco posted nutritional information for the Crunchtada, and it’s unsurprisingly not very healthy. The thing packs 14 grams of fat, and out of its 330 calories, 130 of them are from fat—more than the 30-percent calories-from-fat ratio I try to stay below, which generally eliminates fast food from my diet.

Here’s a picture of the mess:

Then, for journalistic completeness, I ordered a beef Crunchtada Pizza and a chicken Crunchtada Pizza. And that’s when things got pretty weird. 

The Crunchtada Pizza is similar to a Crunchtada, but then topped with meat. The ground beef on it is similar to the tasteless warm “protein” found at Taco Bell, and the chicken is equally bland. To add flavor, the creators of this dish decided to glob a pile of steaming day-glow orange “nacho” cheese on top, and then added flavorless tomatoes and cilantro.

Here’s a picture of the chicken version:

Moral of the story: I’m going to keep staying away from fast food, unless it’s absolutely the only thing around—like on a road trip or something. Especially if there’s a new gimmick designed to draw me back in.

Too bad that Fiery Doritos Taco Loco at Taco Bell has been getting good reviews. Guess I’ll have to stick to Guy Fieri restaurants for “bold” flavors.