I’ve had a thriving massage-therapy practice for 25 years and feel it is time for something different. But I am having a hard time letting go of what I have built. My business is successful; why isn’t it enough?
It was enough, and now it is more than enough. Accept this as your invitation to evolve. As Austin Hill Shaw writes in his brilliant book, The Shoreline of Wonder: On Being Creative:
“You are the creative universe. It’s all in you, packed, simply packed, more atoms than all the stars in heaven, a trillion cells that divided from just two, the story of the universe pervading every one of those cells. … The infinity of your imagination … waiting, just waiting, for your hands upon the clay, your feet upon the dance floor, the song within your throat, the equation in your mind, your fingers on the keyboard, the vision channeled, the message delivered, and voil&#;agrave;! The story of the universe continues.”
We are all called to be creators. You are recognizing the completion of one cycle of self-giving and the preparation for the birth of another.
Don’t argue with the desire for a new calling. Reinvent yourself as the universe does in and through you. If you need more inspiration, turn to www.austinhillshaw.com.
My wife and I divorced six months ago after a three-year separation. We don’t have kids, but I kept our two pugs because her work hours don’t permit her to take good care of them. Since the divorce she calls twice a day to check on the dogs and asks questions about every detail of my life. She never seemed to care much before, about the dogs or me. I think her interest is a good thing. My sister says that I should not take my ex-wife’s calls, at least not every day, and I should not share personal stuff with my ex. Is that true?
Oh, golly, I can’t get between a man and his sister. But I can tell you that your sister is worried about you. She probably thinks your ex-wife is preventing you from moving forward. Is she correct? Does your craving for attention from your ex-wife blind you to the truth? Flip through the files in your mind. See if this is a familiar pattern: Your ex-wife offers her friendship when there is little risk you actually need it. She withdraws when you desire her the most. If that’s true, thank your sister for saving you from another heartache. Then, cut back on responding to the calls. Tell your ex-wife that you are grateful for her friendship and that you would like less daily connection. Explain that this is your way of accepting the divorce and shaping a new vision for the future.
If she misses the pups, invite her to dog-sit. If you will miss your pugs too much to share, don’t. Instead, suggest that she volunteer at a local animal shelter to satisfy her need for puppy love. After nine months to a year, reach out again in friendship to your ex-wife. But only after you discover who you are when not defined by your relationship with her.
“What I am playing with is the voyage between perception and understanding,” said Saul Steinberg, the artist who declared himself “a writer who draws.” What is the creative lens that affects your reality?