If you’ve ever wished you could get drunk on tapioca milk tea, get ready to find fulfillment in Davis. 

Lazi Cow (407 G Street) shut down for a few months this spring for a major remodel. The boba shop held its grand re-opening in June with cow print walls, a large cow sculpture that doubles as a bench, a swing—why not?—and, most notably, a full kitchen. Previously, Lazi Cow primarily sold tapioca drinks and brick toast—those towering pieces of white toast stuffed with more toast and topped with ice cream, fruit and cookies—but now it offers a range of sweet and savory options. On the sweet side, there’s the Filipino dessert Halo-Halo, an intriguing mochi waffle and a few “Cowzookies,” a riff on BJ’s hot skillet cookies called Pizookies. Unlike most boba shops, the savory options here are mostly Mexican—tacos, mulitas, tortas and so on. 

Anyway, on to the real reason you are here: the boozey boba. Lazi Cow boasts eight options ($6-$8), with really silly names that all start with a hashtag and—apart from a couple easy-to-spot spins on classic cocktails—don’t tell you much else. Most of the descriptions aren’t helpful either. Take the #Bromax: “Hello, I am Bromax, your personal drinking companion. On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate your thirst? Will blueberries and strawberries make you feel better?” Exactly.   

In each case, some sort of alcohol is mixed with different teas, but in the fall when UC Davis is back in session, the tapioca pearls will make you tipsy as well. Think vodka gummy bears.

Photo courtesty of Lazi Cow’s Facebook page.